Sometimes I feel like I am struggling to stay afloat; Every time I get above the surface something pulls me down again, constantly trying to drown or suffocate me. I can't breathe. I can't sleep. I shout but no one hears me. I struggle, I stay positive and strong, but something stronger, something evil tries to destroy me.
Sometimes, rarely, a float passes my way. It guides me and it helps me. It shows me that things will be ok; I just have to keep holding on. But it's not always that easy to hold on. The float gets washed away, or my fingers cannot keep grip. How many times will I fall before drowning? How many times will someone kick me back down the minute I land on solid ground?
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About Me
- Portia Freno
- Portia is quickly becoming one of the UK's most popular faces. A multi-talented woman, Portia has successfully branded herself as a model,presenter,columnist,actress, designer and entrepreneur. Her latest projects include her youth charity, her tv show The Diva Diaries,and rehearsing several scripts for film roles. Taking part in fashion shows for clients such as Baby Phat, despite her height, Portia has proven to all aspiring models that nothing is impossible. Her latest feature for YoRaps.com, no1 for celeb news, had so much good feedback and interest that she was asked to film a regular video blog for the site. The Workshop, started by Portia to help guide and encourage aspiring models in their career paths, is running successfully and has a huge waiting list of girls waiting to enrol. Portia is still the only European girl to shoot a 10 page spread for Show Magazine and is a real role model to those that want to break into the industry. With hugely successful celebs such as Kanye West recognising her talent, you'd be crazy not to yourself. For any work-related enquiries contact bookingenquiries@PortiaFreno.com
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6 comments:
I think most people hear you. Clear your mind for a second and reflect. Take a look at yourself from an outside, objective and subjective point of view... ok.
This is part [with numerous errors]of a poem I wrote two days ago, inspired by and based on your last blog and a story an ex bf told me. When it's finished I'll be performing it for Maya Angelou on her 80th birthday [When you get a chance, if you haven't already, read 'And Still I Rise']
"When the sun goes down and the sky’s no longer blue, and the air is filled with that misty evening dew, and people are no longer smiling, they all look so confused with the meaning of life but no one has a clue,
Just rest assure I’ll always be there for you, and if you ever need me I’ll be there to the rescue,
See, nothing will ever stop you from being all you can be, you stand so tall and strong you could see over the trees, ascending to the stars as if you were on a trapeze, please, do me a favour keep them haters on their knees,
Because, your demise is what these people wish for, so when they step to you just show them the closed door, keep them in suspense and they’ll be begging for more, that knocking will turn to banging, one, two, three, four hours have passed... now they’ve smashed the glass, through the door with flaming torches, apocalyptic horses, stampeding through your feelings, the babies are hungry their weaning, their looking at you screaming, asking questions, what is the meaning? Am I dreaming? All I’m seeing is; three headed demons, pleading ... but don’t you get it all they really need is someone to believe in, and when they crave you all they want to do is ease that feeling... It’s your... Success – that – brings – distress – it’s your...progress– that – brings – unrest – ‘cause their... talentless – and – you’re – so – blessed – we all need some comfort and you’re our best bet."
Please stay a float, people like me need you, trust me. Get rid of those demons. .x.
P, I feel ya....That is how I feel so often. Luv ya P :)
I feel your pain, but understand with great success comes great trials and great sacrifice. If it were easy everyone could do it :-)
there will always be the nay-sayers and the people who intend to bring you down, because we all know misery LOVES company.
Just keep your focus on the things you have control over, and the things you dont will deal with themselves.
"People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway. If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; Succeed anyway. If you are honest and frank; People may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway. What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; Be happy anyway. The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway. Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you've got anyway. You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway."
(and this is a video clip i watch sometimes when I am going through "it" and it makes me remember that when two people meet who are equal in talent, the difference is in the mentality..."I will not lose but for even in defeat there's a valuable lesson learned so that evens it up for me")
"You will never meet another person as mentally tough as you, in your entire life" and you havent...and you never will.....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UTuk5Uloyjg
We all feel like this now and then; you probably get it worse than others because you are not a normal person and must have haters and obstacles and set-backs coming out of your ears. It just makes the success even more worthy.
omg i just read ur blog portia and cant beleive what i am hearing.........are you serious thatz who my friendz friend waa talking about i have still bin unable to get the rumour but just wanted u to be aware that something dodgy mite be going on and hve still nt bin sucessful in getting that e-mail....i am so stunned i do not know nadine but i am so stunned that some-one that is also trying to get into the industrie could be so petty......so sorry to hear the full storie i am glad i have put all the puzzlez together because until i read you blog i just thought it was a he said she said rumour as i had not seen the e-mail myself!!! WOW babe i really do under-estimate people u cant take them for face value....keep doing you babe...i know how it is i am good friendz with nickita ukz black rose and i know she getz haterz to from time to time thatz what comez with sucess unfortunately sorry i coudnt be more helpful with content!! But i personally think ur amazing and your extremely beautiful xxxx thatz alot for an insecure female to be jealous of babae but keep you head up and focused xxx luv what your doing god will bless you for your loyalty and pureness xx
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